King Julien Is The Name, Lemur Lovin' Is My Game
by Manchester
Summary: This is a sequel to my story 'Us Aptenodytes Forsteris' Work Is Never Done', where Buffy tries to persuade Willow of the truth concerning what went on at the Central Park Zoo last night. So, the next morning, they pay a visit there…


Maintaining a fixed smile plastered upon his feathered face, the penguin named Private also continued to mechanically wave at the human onlookers beyond the railings of their home enclosure. Standing on the concrete island in the middle of the pool where they resided at the Central Park Zoo, this flightless avian disregarded today's crowd to instead look searchingly past those peoples' feet in the hopes of finally catching sight of a flash of fur belonging to-

Rising from the air shaft leading below to their secret lair, Skipper's voice growled, "Any luck finding that idiot lemur yet?"

"Nossir," Private obediently answered his superior penguin situated a couple of yards beneath the lower-ranking bird. Continuing under his breath in a subdued mutter to keep their conversation secret from the humans around them, Private said, "He hasn't shown up anywhere on the grounds that I can see from here. Is Kowalski doing any better with the security cameras?"

Skipper gave a disgusted grunt, followed by, "Nope. It's like the moron vanished completely into thin air from the whole zoo, which doesn't improve my mood the slightest. Who knows what mischief he's planning which we'll have to clean up all on our own?"

Carrying on with waving at his cheerful audience delighted by how one of the most charming animals at the New York City park was noticing them, Private glumly nodded to himself at the truth of Skipper's annoyed words. Despite his leader's evident bad mood, Private nonetheless dared to ask about the last of their small company. "Uh, can we get Rico back to help us?"

A very icy tone wafted to Private's ears, "_No._ He stands in the corner until I feel he's been punished enough. You know quite well this is all his fault! That lunkhead just _had_ to puke up today's newspaper folded open at the horoscope section, right where Julien could read it! 'You shall meet the love of your life this day', my pudgy rear end! Like we don't already have a hard time keeping our clandestine activities, intelligence, and covert ops totally hush-hush from those humans. All we need now is a sex-crazed lemur running everywhere around the place to play kissy-face with whoever he graciously decides should be the recipient of his amorous attentions! Keep watching, Private, and pray we can head off the whole mess before it goes totally down the drain!"

"Yes, sir," sighed Private.

* * *

><p>Holding the pair of tickets she'd just brought at the Central Park Zoo's front booth, Willow Rosenberg eyed the other young woman walking at her side. After a few more steps together towards the zoo entrance, Willow cleared her throat. "Buffy, before we actually enter <em>Twilight Zone<em> territory, I'm going to say this as nice as I can. When you were here last night - _and_ came across a bunch of talking penguins - you were also at the same time suffering from a Giles-level concussion. You don't think maybe that had something to do with your possible hallucinations?"

Buffy Summers rolled her eyes with real exasperation. She snarkily replied, "Hey, Wils, us Scoobies have been dealing with the mondo weird ever since Sunnydale. The New Council we set up after your hometown cratered itself goes up against vamps, demons, magic, yearly apocalypses, and even stranger events. Why's it so hard for you to take seriously what happened to me yesterday?"

Willow snorted, "Because, oh, I don't know, however gonzo our lives get, at least things stay pretty consistent with the supernatural stuff. What you described to me lying in your bed at our hotel, _that_ was just plain ridiculous. How can penguins talk, anyway? The only birds who are capable of that are parrots and some songbirds, and all they do is mimic what they hear from people! Those black-and-white animals from the South Pole, as cute as they might be, they certainly don't hold actual conversations with each other! What's next, us meeting Rex Harrison or Eddie Murphy here as Doctor Doolittle?"

Instead of being offended by Willow's scoffing, Buffy simply smirked at her friend. Right after Willow handed over their tickets to the gatekeeper and they were allowed into the zoo, the Slayer pointed out, "Okay, okay, now you've gotten that out of your system, will you at least please check this place for the magic-y stuff? That could pretty much explain it all, you have to agree. If you can't find anything, fair enough. I'll just write the whole thing off as another not-of-the-normal episode for me, and we can enjoy our day out together. To sweeten the deal, I'll spring for lunch for us both."

Willow couldn't help but to smile back at where Buffy was grinning at her. She had to admit, it was a fine morning in New York City, and a visit to Central Park with her friend sounded much better than staying inside at their hotel for more New Council business. Eventually, Willow shrugged in acceptance, "All right."

She glanced around the park where they were on the main walkway, to then nod at a side lane surrounded by thick hedgerows. "Let's go over there where I can do a scan in privacy. It won't take long."

Buffy amiably followed Wils to where the side lane curved out of sight of anyone else in the zoo walking by. They stopped at where the witch held up her hand in a clear gesture to halt. When Willow next closed her eyes and took a deep breath, Buffy turned her back to the other woman, standing guard while Wils did what Xander always referred to as 'the major mojo.'

Mentally centering herself, Willow then sent out her mystical senses…and found nothing. Well, not really nothing. There was the natural magic of both the beasts and people currently in the zoo, but this was at the usual minuscule levels for most of mundane humanity and the world's equally ordinary creatures. Outside the zoo, of course, the sheer numbers dwelling in the encircling metropolis showed itself at a much higher amount of mana, but that was also quite familiar to Willow. The witch took a moment to bask in the earth magic of Central Park as a respite from the city's endless steel, concrete, glass, and asphalt, but throughout all her search for any magical explanation for Buffy's recent claim of stumbling upon a group of sentient penguins, she still couldn't-

Hold it. At the very limits of her perceptions, _something_ flickered and dodged. Willow wasn't sure if she was actually aware of this or if it was a mere trick of her senses, but no matter how she tried to pin down whatever that was, the witch had no success at all. Though, whether it might be real or imaginary, Willow couldn't get any kind of feeling either that it was in some way inimical to her and to Buffy. Or, even anybody. Which lead back to it being completely made up by some sort of a fantasy in her mind.

Finally, Willow quit trying and ended her magical scan. She opened her eyes and also her mouth, about to announce with some regret that Buffy had apparently been mistaken and the hard knock this Slayer took to her skull last night resulted in the blonde woman hallucinating a quartet of talking penguins. Except, Willow was interrupted before she could actually say anything by Buffy's surprised scream of fright:

"YAAAAHHHH!"

* * *

><p>A few minutes earlier, King Julien the ring-tailed lemur from Madagascar had been idly lying on his stomach under the hedgerow. Reaching back with one hand to scratch a stubborn itch between his shoulder blades, the lemur frowned to himself in rare cognition about his total lack of success so far in finding true love among the zoo environs, as prophesized by today's newspaper. Surely, such an impressive monarch as he should have no trouble in gaining a proper mate, yet however intensely he'd searched, this hadn't come to pass. Why, in between the numerous naps, the after-breakfast snack, another pleasant doze, a pre-luncheon nibble, a quick forty winks, and his approaching-noontime repast, King Julien only had time to escape from his cage to then travel a few dozen yards away at this spot under the greenery. Hmm, come to think of it, it should be time for lunch any minute now, so perhaps he should consider returning to Chateau Lemur-<p>

Taking a hopeful inhalation in case the food cart for the zoo inhabitants was already on its way, King Julien stiffened in shock at smelling from behind the most delicious scent of his entire life. Scrabbling around on all four paws, the lemur poked his head through the leafy skirt of the hedgerow and he stared in sheer awe at the human woman there on the path emitting the odor of an absolute alpha predator! Shuddering in burgeoning ecstasy, the animal which belonged to a species dominated by its females now rushed out from under the hedegrow, legs vigorously pumping away as King Julien ran directly at the human. When he was within the right distance, Julien next jumped at his target, a goofily adoring grin now upon the lemur's face.

Given her Slayerness which should've warned her in advance, Buffy could still be excused for overlooking something even shorter than her. Besides, who really expects to be attacked by an oversized rat with a ringed tail longer than its entire body that after leaping at her had just fastened all four feet around Buffy's stockinged right lower leg and was holding onto this woman's limb with a death grip?

Willow stared in disbelief at where Buffy was now dancing around on one foot while frantically shaking her other leg, trying to dislodge the strange animal there which obstinately refused to let go. At the same time, Buffy was yelping at the top of her lungs, "_Off! Off! Get it off, Willow!_"

The witch uncertainly raised her hands, trying to think of any spell which might work in dealing with that creature who was now glancing around a bit blearily after Buffy had frozen in place to let Willow do her magic. Apparently, the beast had been rendered a little dizzy due to Buffy's forceful kicking that still hadn't managed to remove it from her leg presently held out perpendicular to the ground.

Indeed, King Julien's whirling thoughts soon stabilized at the happy realization his newly-acquired consort had accepted her lot and now only required a last bit of proper seduction from him to be crowned as the Queen of Central Park Zoo, ruling by at his side. Puckering up, the lemur next started to slobberingly kiss Buffy's knee multiple times.

"THAT'S IT! YOU'RE HISTORY!" Buffy roared. Bending forward over her thigh-high skirt, she reached out with both hands to clamp these around the little furry pest's neck and hips, and then Buffy slowly peeled it off her leg. This removal unfortunately came along with the utter destruction of the Slayer's stocking by the claws of that nuisance hanging on as long as it could. At last putting down her freed leg by her other shoe, Buffy stared in disgust at the squirming animal in her hands which was by the way wearing a really odd sort of headgear. She didn't have more than a moment to think about this, especially when the flailing animal gave a powerful yank against Buffy's fingers.

This caused the animal to slip loose and fall towards the ground, butt first. However, expecting yet another leap at her and also completely fed up at how today at the zoo had become just as ridiculous as last night, Buffy swung her left foot back and then forward and up. Throttling down her Slayer strength at the very last second so as not to turn that damn rat into red goo which would've splashed all over her legs, Buffy nevertheless punted the lemur hard enough to send it rocketing over the hedegrow and out of sight.

Willow just stood there, mouth dazedly open, until she was grabbed by one arm by Buffy and yanked along. Stumbling after while still in the Slayer's angry tow, Willow heard her friend growling to herself, "To hell with this! I don't care anymore! Every animal here's crazy, and you and I are leaving them to it! Even if there's magic in this place, it isn't worth my time!"

Prudently keeping quiet all the way to the entrance and then outside the zoo, Willow glanced back only once. She saw a crowd in the center of the zoo, but they didn't seem to be too upset as they would've been if there'd was a hurt animal there, so Buffy probably didn't make the situation worse. In any case, until she cooled down a little, Willow wouldn't aggravate Buffy any further by mentioning what she might've found with her magical scan. Looking forward again at the same instant Buffy finally let go of her arm to stalk off ahead, Willow noticed where the Slayer was making a bee-line towards, one of Central Park's ice-cream carts.

Picking up her stride, Willow joined Buffy at the snack stop in time for the amused witch to watch how the vendor gawked at the short blonde yanking out a credit card from her skirt pocket and demanding from him, "Shut up and hand 'em over, all you've got! I feel like eating my weight in ice cream right this minute, and I don't want to hear any smart-ass remarks from you, understand?"

Catching the vendor's dumbfounded gaze, Willow merely shrugged, and then silently mouthed at this man, "Just do it, okay?"

* * *

><p><em>KER-WHOOSH!<em>

In their lair, Skipper and Kowalski jerked their heads around to gape at each other at this massive splash suddenly coming from overhead. Next was another unexpected noise of Private at the top of their hideaway just barely managing to stifle his giggles, while also gasping, "Guys, switch to the pool camera! You really need to see this!"

Even Rico still in his corner furtively peeked over his shoulder after hearing this at where Skipper with a very puzzled look on his face nodded in bemused approval. Obeying orders, Kowalski tapped with his flipper the proper switch, and the lit screen in front of the penguins flickered into the scene now present several yards above. At the same time, loud whoops of approval accompanied by hearty applause came through both the air shaft and the interior speakers, as the humans out there reacted to what they thought was an animal performance done entirely without any trainers in sight.

Imperiously ignoring all there, King Julien now lemur-paddled over to the other side of the pool where he'd landed harmlessly a moment ago in the water and sank there before popping up again to the surface. The only sign shown by him of this former Madagascar native's throbbing rear was a truly intense pout while he crawled out of the pool and then slunk off out of sight, dripping wet with a soaked tail and the rest of his fur beginning to curl.

Down in the lair, Skipper, Kowalski, Rico, and even Private who'd joined them were one and all laying flat on their backs, roaring with shared laughter while they held their aching ribs. Eventually, Skipper managed to gasp out what they were all thinking, "Looks like Mister Romance got turned down!"

This leader of their band then beamed at where Rico was looking back with genuine eagerness, before benevolently telling him, "All right, soldier, you're back in the team. Penguins forever!"


End file.
